There will be .. once , twice or more than triples.
You're doing good. Celebrating it happily , funny and you'll forget there were days you did bad.
There will be time,
You're an average. You're doing good, but still you did mistakes. However, you're able to compensate it and keep working all days and didn't give up over the time.
There will be ,
You're having bad times, experience bad lucky , and it makes your mood to swing all days. You'll forget the days you're struggle before, and just think to quit . OR stop . And keep crying ..
But you forgot , lots of people outside request for new chances to get up from the same beds , places and wish to do good again if they could do so .

And What you remember is only your sadness, and tell everyone that you're sad. You're crying.. share in the social webs that you do bad thing today .. feeling like want to give up all things.

you shared your stories with people , specifically your best friend , and whoever that you feel comfortable to share with. But don't you ever think ? Do they really have time to hear your sad stories ? Who are you for them . Think about it. Because people have their own priorities nilie . You can bear everything . Don't bring anyone to feel the same , because they will never feel the same.and maybe they just feel you're keep treating the as your stress reliever. It's better to keep , just tell Allah. Go on the sajdah. Read Quran. and crying till you're okay. Don't give up nilie!

But have you ever thought , why should it have to be different times in our lives?
Can't it be all happiness? Because everyone deserves it. Nobody want to choose sadness.

 But Allah has been said , " لَا يُكَلِّفُ ٱللَّهُ نَفْسًا إِلَّا وُسْعَهَا He will not test you if you can't bear it.

Everybody has their own targets to achieve. But, it's not like you can achieve it everytime. Like what people said, "No pain no gain. Failure is the best father". It's teaching us to be grateful for what we have. Yes, i know we felt disappointed when we failed to achieve , but we have been struggled before. If I ever said , Im targetting for the worst because im not studying , it's wrong . I tell you, it's wrong . I just saying that Im an average , really really an average. So , I know if im getting the best, it's only from Allah. Not from my hardworking . Yet some hardworks may be paid , but it's all about rizk .

Dear parents, im sorry for troubling your arteries since few years before , lowering your confidence , wasting your money ,  made your perception changed 180 degrees , keep saying the best but then it's not. Inshallah , i wil do my super super best . I just want you to know , Im really doing my best pa. Im not doing lagha things here. I will start again to feel B is not enough like before. Maybe my targets is C so my struggle before is D. I will change. Thanks pa , you're always inspired me like always , eventhough it's different for this time . The way you give motivation is indirect . Love you pak , mak. Im sorry.

Your lovely daughter,


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